Announcement

I've been thinking. As we now have a Maori Party whose sole reason for existing is the paramouncy of being Maori, I am officially starting the Blonde Party based on the paramouncy of being Blonde. Brunettes and Redheads are welcome to join. I don't know what the point of that would be but being Blonde, I don't need one. If you feel Blonde, you are. Just wanting to be Blonde is silly and patronising enough to qualify you. I undertake to release a policy every time the Maori Party does. As they are trail-blazing the way for parties based on skin colour and I am trail-blazing the way for parties based on hair colour, I will follow their lead. If I can't come up with a Blonde policy I'll find a Blonde joke. You probably won't notice the difference.

For instance, the Maori Party say Maori should get their Kiwi super savings earlier than anyone else because Maori don't live as long. So the Blonde Party says that Blondes should also get their Kiwi super savings early because low IQ is linked to lower life expectancy. Makes perfect sense.

I am already planning our first campaign which is to lobby Statistics NZ to include a question about hair colour in the 2011 Census. The state needs to plan for the Blonde demographic.

Would you like to join?

Update: I am going to headhunt Sue Kedgley. I just heard her on the radio saying "it was incredulous" that the Wellington region had allocated only 6 pecent of its transport budget to public transport. She knows some big words and with a command of english like that she would project exactly the image we want.