Tuesday, September 08, 2009

'Art' that isn't

Soon I will be submitting an entry into the National Portrait Award. Now I am thinking I should just send the following instructions;

To the installation manager. Walk over to the photocopier and lift the lid. Press your face against the glass and select 'copy'. The result is my entry.

It would save me many hours of expense and effort and maybe, just maybe, I'll get lucky and strike a complete and utter fool of a judge who decides there isn't another entry more deserving of the $15,000 prize.

(Hat-tip Crusader Rabbit)


Anonymous said...

Lindsay, 35 years ago I approached the then QE11 Arts Council for some support for an exhibition of sculpture I wanted to create.

Their first and only question to me was "Where did I do my arts degree?"

I can still hear the patronising chuckles of the enlightened ones as i took my leave.

I never asked the Art Mafia for anything ever again and went on to have a very productive and satisfying creative life.

A few years ago My wife entered some of her paintings in what was an annual Manawatu exhibition of invited artists of note.

Her paintings were displayed in the most appalling and indifferent manner That we took them off the wall and took them home. Our actions went down like a lead balloon, but to thumb our nose at the learned ones was most satisfying.


Opinionated Libertarimum said...

One of those "art" things that plebs like me just don't get. And never will.

"Art" (how I hate to use that word to describe this) might get people talking, but is for the right reasons? All it does is make those in the art sector look like arrogant recipients of taxpayers funds (like the Venice artists came across).

I am appalled.

Buggerlugs said...

Good God. Brings to mind going to the Tate when I lived in London some 15 years ago and there was an exhibition that looked like someone had dribbled down the canvas. I discovered (via a horrific video that explained the exhibition) that the artists got this effect by shoving an enema and paint up his jacksy and then let nature take its course all over the canvas. Let's just say I wasn't hungry after that lot....but the Tate thought it was art, and shite.

brian_smaller said...

I think the 'judge' got all excited that someone from Berlin had entered. And it was so "now". They didn't even have to do it themselves, just get the art gallery staff to dump rubbish on the ground. Brilliant concept.