Money is a powerful motivator. But the degree to which it motivates varies strongly across individuals. My own self-assessment is low on the scale. My ideal is to be free from financial anxiety and unmanageable debt but I don't yearn after overseas travel, flash clothes, etc. When I was a teenager I was more motivated by money than I am now because I didn't have any! And I wanted stuff. So I worked at various jobs while still at school.
Where is all this leading? You know that claim that young women don't get pregnant to get on the DPB; "There is no evidence" welfare supporters say. The anecdotal, like being told personally by a teenage parent co-ordinator that money is a major factor, is not admissible.
I accept that young women want to become mothers. The prospect of a tiny little soft, loving, dependent being that is all theirs is not an unattractive idea. But would it be so if there was no money attached?
Imagine a moment. A 16 year-old girl disinterested in school bar the social aspects; unhappy at home where she is nagged about not achieving and being lazy; or worse, where she is fighting off a frequently drunk 'uncle'; with a group of slightly older mates who are flatting together and 'earning' their own money from student allowances; but with no interest in continuing to study; with a boyfriend she is crazy about but at the same time insecure about. Tell me that having up to $500 a week appear in her bank account wouldn't be appealing.
And she can get that even before the baby is born so it's not like she has to wait a full nine months. She can sign up for the sickness benefit, claim an accommodation supplement and Bobs your uncle (and hopefully escaped from).
But what do we know about young people? Their brains aren't formed we are told. That's what the anti-drinking brigade hammers on about. The driving age should be raised because they lack decision-making capacity and judgement skills. That's what the raise-the-driving-age brigade tells us. Too many young teens, particularly Maori smoke. That's what the anti-smoking brigade tell us.
The teen years are extremely risky years. They still really need a great deal of guidance and advice from mum and dad, the wider family, from teachers and, in some cases, their peers.
Yet as a society we persevere with this idea of incentivising them to become parents.
Babies are incredibly demanding. My first was premature and colicky. My marriage was at its rockiest during his first year. There are times when you have to dig deep for reserves of energy and patience in a way you never have before. Most young teenagers aren't up to it. Any neither should we expect them to be. It's still their time to focus on their life.
Today we read that Family Start funding is going to be cut to some agencies. They aren't tackling child abuse and neglect successfully enough apparently. Home visitation to parents at risk of harming or abusing their children through indifference has not proved to be the shining solution after all. Not across the board anyway. Is anybody surprised?
Well-intentioned home visitors can, in any event, only get into the homes of the willing. My example has just gotten away from annoying, demanding, adults. The last thing she wants is her inability to cope criticised in the same way as her inability to focus at school. And, anyway, tomorrow she will start coping. There's always plenty of time when you are 16. Plenty of time to change. Trouble is, the baby doesn't have the same luxury.
It Ain’t Half Hot Mum – #32 – S05E03 – The Pay Off
32 minutes ago
1 comment:
My ex-partner's sister did precisely this at 16. She was angry with her mother because she had to go to school and didn't want to, couldn't have boyfriends spend the night, and wanted to, and was asked to help around the house, but didn't want to.
She found out that if she had a kid she could get child support and housing, meaning she didn't have to go to school, could have boyfriends spend the night, and didn't have to work around the house and that the taxpayers would pay for that. So she intentionally got pregnant so she could move out of home without having to find a job.
She eventually got her act together, but it took her a long time and she hurt herself long term. Sadly the child, a boy, died in a motorcycle accident as a teen.
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