Friday, April 12, 2013

"Deep thoughts..."

Another e-mail in-box arrival. Those my age and older will identify with 17:

Deep thoughts for those who take life way too seriously

1. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.

2. A day without sunshine is like......night.

3. On the other hand, you have different fingers.

4. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

5. He who laughs last thinks slowest.

6. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

7. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.

8. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

9. How many of you believe in psycho kinesis?...Raise my hand.

10. OK...so what's the speed of dark?

11. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

12. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

13. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?

14. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

15. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

16. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

17. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what  happened.

18. Just remember---if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.

19. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

20. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a really hot curry. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow.

2 comments:

Manolo said...

I realise the wisdom of 16.

Anonymous said...

4. Remember, half the people you know are below average.

Only applies to symmetrical distributions. 90% of people are above average drivers - because 10% of drivers cause basically all the accidents.

Roughly 80% of letters in English freqency are "below average" because e,t,a,o,i,n make up 50% of the letters we use writing - the other 80% of letter make up the other 50%

More importantly, 90% of the population are below average in success, value, and worth

the deserving 10% are who pays for everything for everyone else.

90% of people are well below average

On this misunderstanding lies essentially all the foundations of leftism - and why equality of outcome and equality of opportunity can only ever be reached by massive taxation and repression.

That is an actual fact. unlike #4.