Tuesday, July 07, 2009

Restraint

Regular readers of this blog will know that in the league of blogosphere rudeness mine just doesn't rate. It is not in my nature to slam and slag people off. I don't find it therapeutic and attention seeking isn't a priority either. However I would not like to give the impression that I never speak ill of people. I do. But I confine my comments to people I know well and trust - making them, that is:-)

That, I feel, is as it should be.

If I was cleverer and quicker remarks such as the following might trip off my tongue. They would also be more than acceptable;

"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

"I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas

"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill
"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second... if there is one." - Winston Churchill, in response.

"I feel so miserable without you; it's almost like having you here." - Stephen Bishop


5 comments:

Adolf Fiinkensein said...

Very good.

KG said...

Excellent! :-)

brian_smaller said...

Mae West is a good source of one liners. One of my favourites is something like: If there is a choice between two evils I always pick the one I haven't tried before.

Sus said...

Lindsay, re the line you have attributed to Paul Keating, I read years ago that it was Muldoon on Bob Tizard -- definitely before Keating's (political) time.

Anyone else?

brian_smaller said...

I thought that was Muldoon on Bill Rawling.