Sunday, July 31, 2011

Crucial admission

So someone with credibility comes out and says that some boys expect to grow up and live off the mothers of their children because that is what they have grown up with. I have not a shred of doubt that Alison Sutherland is correct.

Alison Sutherland, who works in Wairarapa schools with children who have behavioural problems, says many of the boys she deals with – who haven't even reached their teenage years – can only see being the father of children and living with their mothers ahead.

"That is their career future," she said of youngsters who were opting out of education and employment because they saw babies as a source of income.

But coupled with the desire for children was a complete lack of understanding of what being a good parent might entail.

"There is no warmth about loving little children or wanting to be good parents. It is purely about this being a pathway to an income," the one-time principal of a youth justice facility school said.

"They have a perception that their future is to be unemployed. That is their norm. They have no sensitivity for the children – they see it as their form of income."

Sutherland said in some cases the children were merely repeating what they saw in their own homes.



Not mentioned is the expectation is most certainly more widespread amongst Maori. Consider recent research I previously linked to that showed those teenagers, male or female, identifying as sole Maori, were seven times more likely to become teen parents.

This is an insidious and dangerous state of affairs because, like children that are meal tickets and therefore unvalued and unloved for themselves, so are females. They will be abused in one way or another; to one degree or another.

The article goes on to say,

The sole-parent domestic purposes benefit is available to those over 18 who are not in a relationship with the other parent and do not have a partner, or who have lost their support.


Wrong.

They can be in a relationship with a partner and receive the DPB so long as it is not deemed as 'in the nature of marriage'. This involves the male not providing any financial support or emotional committment. Perfect.

Christ. I don't know what is wrong with the people who have the power to change this state of affairs yet let it continue. It is thoroughly de-humanising, immoral on any scale of values and exponentially self-perpetuating.

10 comments:

FF said...

We need another 30 years of research to see if there might be a trend developing here.

Lindsay Mitchell said...

And a red paper, a yellow paper, a blue paper, a pink paper......

Riz said...

and 11 years it took you to write such crap??

So tell US who funds you lady

the real hidden backers?

Crosby and texter I bet
people like you make me sick

why not start blaming the colonisation of this country and then you might learn something dumbass

WorkerB said...

FFS, Late last year the Ministry of Social Development said it was difficult to estimate how many young men were fathers because their names weren't always on their children's birth certificates.

Here is a hint multiply the number of young mums x 1 = how many young men were fathers unless there has been a second coming of Christ. How bloddy hard can it eb

And anyway don't blame them for taking advantage of a bloody stupid system that allows this form of bludging.

WorkerB said...

wow Stoner, another Greenie intellectual who can blame classic colonial mistreatment of his DISTANT forebears for this blight on communities . Get a life wanker , I bet you have had just as many opportunities as the rest of us baby boomers , If you feel disadvantaged it probably your attitude that engenders that

FF said...

*why not start thanking the colonisation of this country*

There fixed it for you.

Don’t let the flyscreen hit your entitled ass on the way out.

Anonymous said...

Lindsay. My wife visits with teenage mothers whose teenage partners/boyfriends/father of their child/s sit around smoking dope and drinking booze while the mother deals with the important issue of raising the children.

We appear to be developing a parallel cultural behaviour patern modeled on those of Asia Minor where the man is supreme above all else. i see this behaviour in palmerston North on a regaular basis as Muslim men congregate to do their man thing with no women in sight.

have a friend from Sierra Leone whose wife is never seen socially, but is on hand to serve her husbands every need.

Dirk.

Anonymous said...

Well, if the support system is dismantled, things will be ugly for quite a while. Are we prepared for an explosion in street children and homeless adults if the cash flow is turned way down?

It will take a while for the message to get through, and children will suffer and die miserably until the attitude of entitlement is erased.

(Picture the possible scene in Auckland with real malnutrition plastered all over the 6:00 news...)

Do we really have the stomach to handle the consequences of forcing people to take responsibility for their actions? I don't think NZ society is stern enough to go the distance.

Brendan McNeill said...

This generation is broken. Our aim is to prevent the perpetuation of this stupidity by giving advance notice that teenagers will no longer qualify for the DPB.

David Garrett said...

The comments on this are almost as scary at the article you refer to Lindsay..."Stoner" actually believes that a PR company which charges what are no doubt exhorbitant fees is one of your "hidden backers" !! Mind you, since he or she also believes that every social problem suffered by Maori is down to "colonization" about six generations ago, I guess that's not too suprising....

The losers sitting around drinking and smoking dope dont distress me as much as the poor children who have that to look forward to because they will be brought up expecting nothing else...